How Not to Resist Change and Overcome Challenges

Mar 14, 2023


Suzy: Hey everyone. Welcome to another episode of The Adventures of a Real Estate Investor. I'm Suzy. 

Michael: And I'm Michael. And we're excited you joined us for this adventure. 

Suzy: So today, Michael and I are super excited because we have our first repeat guest on and Right. 

Faisal: I'm your first Repeat guest!

Suzy: Yes. Yeah. you are gonna find so, so, so, so, so much value other listeners did in the past.

If you wanna check out. Oops. Not gonna say its name yet. It's gonna be like a little, you're, it's gonna be a cliffhanger. So you'll find Faisal Ensaun in episode 18. He talks a lot about like choosing your shovel, whether that was fear or anxiety, and how to help you to move forward with that, anywhere in your journey of life.

And so it's cool because when we talked about it a year ago when I first met him and joined his coaching program cuz that that was the whole reason to have him on. Faisal was my high-performance coach and he, like I was in that coaching program a lot during Covid, during the Lockdowns. So I wanna preface the lockdowns because over here in the UK it was much, much, much longer than in the States, and I just learned so much about myself, so much just about who I needed to like grow and become as a person. And so it was so beneficial for me to be a part of the coaching program, but also to have him on the like episode 18. And so now I'm super excited that you are back with us again because it's gonna be great. 

Faisal: Me too. I'm so excited. Thank you for having me again. 

Michael: Absolutely. So before we begin the show, would you mind sharing with our listeners just a brief background about yourself? I know there was a pretty detailed intro background about you Faisal in episode 18. So if you wanna learn more listeners, go to episode 18. Listen to that one. But, Faisal bring us up to speed. 

Faisal: Are you telling me to be Not long-winded,

Michael: Don't worry be much winded as you want. 

Faisal: You know what's funny is that there was somebody that was actually my, somebody who helped me design a lot of my stuff. She's awesome. And she sent me a Loom video explaining that I was longwinded and that by the end of it, she was pretty longwinded. I'm like, Well, it takes one to know one

Suzy: I love that. 

Faisal: People laugh about it. Just brief background. I jumped into the whole coaching world. First of all, I didn't even know what coaching was to, to begin with. all I wanted to know was that I realized that I loved working with people and a lot of it started with me just struggling with my own path, which is trying to figure out who I was in the mix of there's this quote that I always loved is that, who were you before the world got it's hands on? And it really had a profound effect on me. He's like, who was I? And my journey has been just a rediscovery of that self. And where that, you wanna call that your core, your soul, your child self, whatever you wanna call it, it's, it's, everybody has it inside of themselves.

It's when we are put in a specific environment, we tend to adapt to that environment and we let go of a lot of aspects of who we naturally and authentically are. and a lot of people that I've worked with, it's that journey back to themselves. And along the way, they discover their passion, their purpose, their vision for their life, and how they want to contribute, and that's been, my journey.

And along the way, as I've discovered, I realize, I love working with people to take them on that journey and supporting them to figure out their purpose, figure out their path, their vision, and their potential, and along the way, contribute greatly in the world. And I've been on this journey for seven-plus years at this point.

It took me from jumping outta my job burning all the bridges to building a couple of businesses along the way, but more importantly, learning a lot from some incredible people, from my clients to business partners, to amazing people from around the world that I continue to learn from consistently. So was that short or was that too long?

Michael: That was perfect. 

Suzy: Well, how, since the last time you've been on in the last year. What has changed for you in your business around just coaching in general? 

Faisal: Oh, my, there's, there's so much that has changed. So the one thing I've learned, whether it's my clients or myself, we tend to change every, like a few months.

Yeah. It's never this. Oh, I'm the same person as I was last year, or even six months ago, three months ago. It's like this consistent evolution and if I'm changing, my business is changing. If I'm changing the people that I'm connected to, they're changing to, my clients are changing, my business partners are changing, so, so much in there, but more specifically on the pandemic, as you said, was a very interesting time because more and more people were open to, they had one, they had the time, and then they developed the necessity because they started all of a sudden, there's this Big thing that hit and they're like, they started questioning a lot of things about their life, their path, their business in many in very positive ways, especially investors, multi-family investors that I've worked with primarily.

And they started discovering that they actually enjoyed being at home with their family. They enjoyed traveling. They enjoyed, even if that was going camping or just going on hikes and, and weekends away. It was very interesting for them cuz they never had the time to even process that. So all of a sudden now they're like, okay, what does this all mean?

And they didn't have like, whoa, whoa, I don't know what that means. And then the coaching journey as, as I've taken my clients through it, has helped them kind of rediscover, recreate themselves. And incidentally, if you look at like the statistical chart, most people who make, like from a business point of view, people who make, when they go from one bracket of income to the next, it's the moments, it's between 20 to 40 I think, where they, they make the biggest leap.

After that, it kind of stabilizes for most people it's because they are forced to recreate themselves over and over. Not by choice. They're forced because they're growing up, and they have to adapt to so many situations. They're going from teenage to twenties to their thirties, and then so many situations that they go through.

But as soon as they stabilize at around forties, you see that their income stabilizes too and there there's not a big shift up unless they're actually consciously recreating themselves. And, so for a lot of my clients that recreation path is very powerful because it doesn't just help them personally all of a sudden, it helps 'em create a bigger vision for their business, for their legacy, for their purpose. And how they're giving back. So for me, a big part of why I do what I do and I joke around with my clients. I'm like if you found out how much I gain out of these sessions, you probably wouldn't pay me

They get a lot too. So for me, it's been an incredible journey just watching my clients, but also having a team, and business partners and my vision has gotten bigger. My purpose has gotten more specific, and I've literally doubled down in the past few months on both of my businesses and reinvested a lot of my money into so many programs because I realized, one, there's the changing times a lot of times when the economy changes like this and there potential recession and, and market crash and all sorts of things that, that might be forecast that people go into contraction.

But what a lot of people don't realize is that that's where opportunity is too in these times because people are so scared and it's the few who take advantage of it. Those are the ones who are able to pan out and deal with that internally. They're able to consciously look and see. There are actually a lot of opportunities and so for me, that's, I have completely revamped a lot of the things and I'm in the process of doing that.

And part of that is this is also, I got sick and tired of just being in front of Zoom for two years.

Suzy: no, no, no one did. 

Faisal: As much as I love my work. I want to meet people in person. And I've already started doing that. And, just that we were talking about it before I was in Europe for a few weeks. It was challenging, but I did meet a lot of people.

It's very interesting North America has a very different perspective on Covid than when you go to Europe. 

Suzy: Totally 

Faisal: it is a whole different world 

Suzy: Yeah. Two different pandemics it feels like 

Faisal: two different pandemics. Like they, it is very odd. It's just perception. Everything is different.

So when I come back and, and I've gone twice during the Pandemic to Europe, last time I went at the height of it, I think it was the end of 2020. I was in London and Sweden and London was more locked down compared to Sweden was, it's as if it didn't exist. Yeah. There, my sister lives there. We're walking and I'm like, should we walk around like this we were told not to do any of this shit.

Suzy: Yeah, right. 

Faisal: So, so it was interesting. Now as I went back to some people, I was in Estonia at the Mind Valley SuperCoach event, around 500 plus coaches and influencers, business owners, and people are very open to seeing each other. People are open to kind of, they've gone through two years of trying to make sense of the world, trying to make sense of their life business, but they're ready to reconnect and create something different.

especially, those who are open to growth, I think. And so for me, my path is taking me more towards that. So I'm actually doing quite a few events. Much of my efforts are going toward collaborating with other influencers and coaches. I'm actually doing a multi-family event with a few, Ian's Nelson, I think he's been on your podcast too, my client, but also I'm collaborating with him and his team.

We're doing an event in Colorado in October, Denver. Pay it forward. Yeah, pay forward. Yes. So we're collaborating on that together and I'm doing more of the mindset stuff and he and his team, they're doing the multi-family. We're also collaborating on the other end too. There's a lot of stuff coming up on the back end of it.

So we're working through that. And I'm doing an event in Toronto for one day. It's a one-day boot camp with a real estate broker, and I'm doing a seven-day retreat in Thailand in February. So for me, it's just this kind of pull to go see people and, when I say people, for me it's mostly leaders who are wanting to create some kind of change, whether it's in their family, their community, their organization to see, well, how do we make sense of what, just all this crazy stuff that just happened and how do we deal with the consequences of what just happened in our lives and our communities and the bigger world of business and everything, and a lot of it comes down to personal leadership and ownership and your vision for yourself or your company or organization for your family. It comes down to that stuff because if you are not clear about that stuff, you more than likely will be pulled into somebody else's idea of what that is, how you should act, and what you should do versus your own conviction around what you should.

So I'm, I'm excited to go out. And really serve people. Just being around people, and connecting with people in person, and that's what I'm excited about and that's what I'm working towards more and more. 

Michael: That's awesome. Throughout this whole thing, the only thing I could think of was this quote that, you know, everything in life, excuse me.

The only thing constant in life is that everything always changes. And I love that quote because it reminds me that don't resist change. Because when you resist change, then you end up growing. and so it's, I feel like it's a human nature thing to resist change because it takes you outside of your comfort zone and to be comfortable doesn't require a lot of effort and a lot of energy, but when you, which makes sense, right?

Because you're trying to evolutionary speaking whatever. I'm not gonna get into all the details, but I'm sure you have a lot of clients that come on and they are scared of change. Or they resist change. What is something that you tell them? you know, or how do you help them cope with that in order to embrace the change and know that their biggest dreams lie on the other side of, growth?

Faisal: Yeah. I love that. That's, that's a very powerful thought. And change is such a paradox for human beings because, on the one hand, our brain doesn't want us to change too much because like I said, it's that comfort area. Because anything we wanna do that could potentially put us at risk is like, don't even.

Something like working out is like that could potentially hurt you or something like going outside of your comfort area, your hometown, or doing anything that's outside of what, you know, sends alarms in our nervous system. Mm-hmm. And so a lot of people resist that. But paradoxically, like said the other side of it is that we need change.

We're an aspect of nature. Nature doesn't stay the same. I mean, the only thing that's constant, is change. In the universe and nature, we go through cycles, but it's consistent changes that happen. Our body goes through changes, our thought process goes through changes, and our family structure goes through changes, organizations, and the economy all go through changes. 

Everything goes through changes. The most important reality that we need to face. Now, when you say, what do you tell them? I'm sure Suzy remembers this. I don't tell people anything, to be honest. Yeah, it's more about me helping them kind of discover, asking the questions that help them lead towards their own answers and the answers that feel aligned with them.

In fact, we actually have multiple conversations with one specific topic. I think Suzy, maybe you remember, we went through the human drive for change. And ultimately every human being has to decide what their level of adaptability to change is. There are people who can be high-risk tolerance, and people who are lower risk tolerance, and these are not like static things.

You can, you can choose and you can train yourself to adapt to different situations, but ultimately everybody has to make the decision or the problem is that we're not taught how to explore those things. And on top of that, exploring yourself leads you, to a level, but at some point, you will stop. You need an external source to get you to go a little bit deeper cuz we all have blind spots.

Including me. That's why I need a coach. I need multiple coaches. In fact, I have a coach pretty much in every area right now. , literally every area of my life of relationship, high performance, sales coach, business coach, that I have 'em all because I know the value of that. I know that there are a lot. I know what I know. Past that I don't know, and there are a lot of things in terms of the positive and the negative that can come up, but ultimately, Roundabout answers,

I don't actually tell people anything about that stuff. I will share perspectives, but ultimately what I like to do is help people go deeper and understand what is important to them in terms of change. How do they adapt to change in their life, and how do they wanna adapt to change? Do they want to take more risks, or do they not?

And that all depends on their vision, on their purpose. So what you find is the bigger the vision, the bigger the purpose, and bigger doesn't necessarily mean in terms of quantity for them, whatever, relative to their experience. The higher those things get, the more the necessity goes up. And we know this through research that as necessity goes up, people are more inclined to take bigger risks.

Calculated, but bigger, bigger risks. And they're able to adapt to different changes, whether it's changes that come to them or changes that they actually create in their life. And that's the other side of it. One is the change that comes such as a pandemic, but the other side of it is that actually high performers tend to create change in challenges in their life.

 I'm curious to hear from Suzy, what did you, I mean, from a client's perspective, what did you gain as we went through those conversations? Around change challenge and how you kind of made sense of it yourself. 

Suzy: So the biggest thing for me was like when it came to change, right? Because like change over here for me was, okay, I am now in a pandemic.

We're in, we're in lockdown. So I'm not around people anymore. Like how do I adapt to that? Going through the motions. And I remember one question specifically that really like changed at all. I was like, you know what, this would've been worth a million dollars if that's how much this, 

Faisal: Dammit, I should have charged you a million dollars.

Suzy: Yeah, This coaching would've been that price because, for me, I felt lonely. And it was okay, well that's really hard. That can be a change for somebody. And I'm not getting the support I need. And all you really asked was, are you looking for support in the right places? And I was like, I'm done 

Faisal: I was done. I dunno why she kept showing up after this 

Suzy: because I wasn't, and like that was one big thing. And I bring this up in the change sense because it gave me an entire mindset shift to look for whether that is support, whether that is like another coach, whether that is a business venture in different places, right?

Like whether that was, you know, like what is my love language? Has that changed? It's made me think so much differently about how all I need to do as you're mentioning earlier, is open up some of those blind spots to be open to looking for the answer in places that I least expected, which is really difficult to do. 

But with that, even just to like bring this in with coaching, what it also made me realize was that so many people don't want to put up the money for coaching. But like I said earlier, like that one question and answer that came upon me, cuz you had mentioned that too. It's just like the rhetorical questions that you ask back that make us think, wow.

It was in there the whole time. I just never thought about it, but that made me realize that like in-person events, like, because I didn't get them over here. Were huge for me and worth the costs really, no matter what they were, because that's how I filled my cup. So like from that standpoint, I think we need to think about like who we are as people.

What does filling your cup look like? Cuz it might be different from what you thought it was, but like actually realizing that cuz I think so many of us are running on a half tank, thinking that we can get by, but like once you fill your cup. It stays full. Well, I mean for me, for quite some time, right?

And I can work better and I can live better, and I can laugh better, and I can love better like all of these things. But like going at half full to me didn't work because you're not really happy in that space. And so for a change to bring it all back together. What I learned from it with change in adapting is that it's really just being open to knowing that your cup can be completely full all of the time and like when you do need to refill it, it's actually very easy and you can do it quickly. That was huge for me. 

Faisal: I love that. That makes me very happy. thank you for sharing that, Suzy. And it's the idea of, and this is the two sides of it. I kind of categorize our emotions into two sides. On the one side, We have survival emotions, and we have growth emotions.

they're not negative and positive. We were taught to think of emotions as negative and positive. They just do specific things, survival emotions. Fear, anger, anxiousness, anxiety, all sorts of emotions like that. Growth Emotions are more joy, peace, happiness, and connection. 

So they both have functions in our system. They're not negative or positive. You need fear. If you didn't have fear walking through the woods, then you didn't understand and didn't pay attention to a bear coming from the other side. You're screwed. So that fear is a good thing to have. If you're walking around with somebody and there's a bus coming towards you or, or something, the fear keeps you intact.

 It has a function. It's not even fear. More of an awareness, but it connects to those emotions. And then the other side of it, the emotions that we need to grow. That's why I call 'em growth emotions. So a lot of people think that I need to think logically. No humans are emotional beings.

We don't, we use logic, but our decisions are all emotional in nature. Whether you are either in a state of calm, peace, excitement, and joy, or are in a state of fear, anger, frustration, and all that stuff. So when you make a decision, especially, especially related to business, especially related to creating something for your personal life, you are how you connect with people.

If you're using survival emotions to make those decisions, more than likely it's going in the wrong direction because, in survival emotions, you're engaging the different parts of your brain's limbic system. It's a closed-off system. You can only see a few things with growth emotions. When your cup is full, as, as Suzy says, you tend to be much more open.

You tend to be much more curious. Yeah. You tend to wanna spend time with people. You tend to want to connect. It naturally generates ideas. It naturally gets you to move it. Naturally gets you to explore, and for people who are able to do this, we're able to put a pause or process their survival emotions and move towards more of the growth emotions.

Not suppress them, but, but process them and understand that, hey, my growth is on this side. Then they tend to have a better ability to navigate changes. They will still feel fear, they'll still feel anger, they'll still feel frustration, but they will process it and then they'll ask them themselves.

Suzy had a really good thing all she kept saying over and over, every time she would come on the call was, does this serve me? and just that one question can switch them towards the growth side. And it can be very powerful. It can be the difference between suffering and happiness, adventure and being in a fetal position.

Suzy: Yeah, totally. 

Faisal: So I wanna share a quick story. So just in relation to change, cuz for me, I had a huge change and it's very interesting for me. And both my wife and I, so we just, I was telling the story. We went to Europe a few weeks back and we were there for about three weeks. So it was supposed to be a month and a half trip, but we cut a short, lots of challenges.

We all need to learn to travel after two years. So not blaming anybody but the airlines, including us. It is just. It was a mess. But on top of that, lots of things happened our kids got sick, so we dealt with lots of challenges during the travels. There were lots of good experiences too. By good, I mean positive experiences in the sense that we were happy, we were connected, and we were joyful.

Even with the challenges of our camps, we came back, we took a deep breath. They're like, ah, I'm glad I'm back. But as we look back, it was very interesting in retrospect as we look back, something changed within us. So, and especially like the literally happened this past week, we were doing our planning for the next, and we have a big calendar in our kitchen.

My wife and I were scheduling out, she's going to an event. I'm doing a few events. I'm going to a few events. So pretty much out of the next six months, we were traveling at two and a half months and we're looking at each other. This traveling, as challenging as it was, did bring us closer as a family.

We did learn a lot of things and we learned a lot of things to do and a lot not to do, and our kids were pretty happy. So why are we staying in one place? Yeah. And so we kind of made a decision. We're actually letting go of our home. and we're putting all our stuff in My mother-in-law's place.

Most people don't know this, so announcing this is the first time here. Yeah. My family members don't even know, so they might get a shock out of this. So we're, we're putting our stuff there and so in the next two months, we're gonna start traveling. A lot of it will be events and stuff. We also have a more of home, especially in wintertime, we'll be in the states a couple of months out of that, so we're extending it a little bit more. We still have a home base in Ontario, Canada, because we have a lot of family and friends here. But a big chunk of it, we're gonna be just exploring, seeing what happens. Part of it is business, and part of it is just adventure. Part of it is just rediscovering what our culture is as a family of like, how do we deal with changes and how do we adapt to different things? And I think that that journey is very interesting. 

So it's, it's the most amazing thing is that that change brought all sorts of stuff, but ultimately it help us realize a different path which we weren't really expecting as much, so, yeah. 

Suzy: I really love that because like when most people see challenges, right? They run away from them. That's, this is what we've been talking about the whole entire time, and so I like, I congratulate you and honor you to be doing that, cuz that's like really awesome and your family will learn so much, which I'm excited about cuz Michael, I wanna do that one day.

Yeah. But, I have a little story to share about challenges just because I think this really fits in. So in Five days will be one month since I was hiking and I fell and I sprained the inner part of my knee on my ACL. And we talked at the beginning about how working out is a challenge for some people.

And I'm letting you, I just wanna share this cuz like, it's been really difficult for me the past month, like knowing that I cannot exercise or function the way I used to is so much more challenging than any workout I have ever done in my entire life. So like when you choose your challenges or what your easy thing is to do, I really think you should reflect on like, What does easy or challenging mean to you?

Because I will now never think that a 30-minute stretching or workout is a challenge because really what is a challenge is that I cannot go downstairs easily anymore. You know, like things that we take for granted. And that's really, I think what I wanna get deeper into is like what we take for granted.

Because when those things are gone, that's really when the challenges begin. So like walking downstairs, I never thought I wouldn't be able to do that one day. And now like you would think I was 85 years old, you know, one step each one at a time. And so like what you take for granted and what you think a challenge is, I think you should ask yourself why you think it's a challenge multiple times and see how deep you can get into the answer without repeating yourself because that's really when you get vulnerable. With all the feels on what you thought a challenge might be. 

Faisal: Yeah. I love that. that's so powerful. And there are so many things we take for granted. For if you lose a finger or if you've hurt a finger, you will know how difficult your daily life gets, let alone spraining a foot or an ankle, or you, all of a sudden you come with depression.

And a lot of people are going towards that, especially at all the stuff that has happened from lack of support, lack of exposure to other people, and people being at home not being able to work out or not choosing to work out in a lot of cases and overeating, it tends to have a, an effect. And then, As you start to lose a lot of abilities, you start to know the holly shoot.

Things that I thought were challenging are not really challenging, and this is why when we look at high performers, They tend to create challenges for themselves. They don't wait. They don't wait for nature, the world, God, or whatever you want to call it, to bring challenges to them. I think it's Tony Robbins that has a saying.

He's like, I stopped waiting for God to give me challenges. I started giving myself challenges so he doesn't give me any. Yeah. So it's that interesting. And you, like, if you just watch people who have gone more towards a leadership path, people who are taking care of themselves, who are supporting others.

They tend to create changes and challenges in their life because they understand that that's a very normal part of life. In fact, that's the thing that will help them develop resiliency. That's the thing that will help them support others. That's a tell, that thing that will help them stay alive, but not just stay alive, but create a living and, and be alive, consistent.

And it's a very interesting way of looking at things and most people, unfortunately, don't think like that. Most people just automatically go towards whatever they're taught and which means creating a certain level of comfort and you're good, but it doesn't work, doesn't work long term because it just that your body starts to break down.

 Your mind needs novelty and challenge. I literally did a video this morning about retirement. like, let's talk a little bit about retirement. You're sold a lie about that because your system just doesn't work with the way we look at retirement. Oh, I make a certain amount of money until 50, 60 years and then I'll retire.

Especially looking at the human lifespan increasing more and more after it. Statistically, we know that when you retire, you lose us. Your health declines when you have nothing to do because your system is understanding that. You're done. You have no purpose. It might be fun for a few months, a few years, but then all over time it just starts like, okay.

 I feel useless. I don't have a purpose. I'm not contributing. And you're sending signals to your body more than, like, nobody can predict how long we're alive or anything like that, but it's more about the quality of life. Because when depression hits, when you're physical, you start to decline.

And so many ways, it affects so many things, doesn't just affect you, it affects your whole family. It affects your whole community in so many ways. But I really love that and, and I think the theme is that I love what you said is that you, you need to make that choice. And the choice might be that the challenges that you think are challenges, they're, they're not as big as you think they are, and unfortunately, we have to go through certain experiences to understand that.

Like you went through that experience. 

Suzy: Yeah totally. Cuz I was talking to Michael about it. I was like, I don't know if I will ever like skip a workout again. The strength or the flexibility that I lost in my knee was due to me not stretching as often as I used to, which then brought on the sprain and I'm like never again.

Stretching is so easy. Going down the stairs, like hopping actually is a better word for what I've been doing is way more challenging than the 30-minute stretches that I stopped doing. So it's just, it's just crazy. How we, how we choose what we choose. I don't know. I don't know how it works. It's how we brought it up.

It's how every day, every day brings a new decision for us, and, it all just blows my mind. 

Michael: Yeah, absolutely. Well, it's been a pleasure. It's been a, this has been a really cool podcast. But now I am going to Take us to the adventurous four, the four exploratory questions. We have all of our guests, you have answered these questions before, but it's been a year and I'm assuming some of the answers might have changed.

But let's see. Yeah. So if there's so much growth occurring, right? I'm sure changes to the answer. Right? So anyways, the first question we have for you, Faisal is where is one place you wish to travel to? 

Faisal: Actually Thailand. I'm really looking forward to it. I, I haven't gone there and as just, I'm really looking forward to Bali and Thailand, those two places out, and they're closer together too.

So when I go there, I'm planning to go on both sides. Just that side of the world is, I come from Asia, so I mean, Turkey was partially in Asia, partially in Europe. yeah, totally. So I'm just, and getting our kids exposed cuz they were born in Canada and, other than our family members and everything, they don't know about other cultures.

I mean, Toronto's pretty multicultural, but still, it's different when you go to a place. Right. So really little looking forward to the culture there and, and just exploring and seeing and just being in an amazing environment with incredible people who are actually on that path of growth.

Suzy: I like it. So I'm gonna switch up the second question a little bit, but it is, what is one thing on your bucket list and how are you leveraging coaching to achieve it?

Faisal: That was the investing question. Wasn't it? Well, I also look at coaching and all these are investments in, yourself really, and in so many ways. But for me, I think how I'm leveraging it, I'm actually in the process of growing and scaling my business, which means that I'm doing much more group stuff, whether it's events or it's online group coaching.

 I'm scaling at that level. I'm collaborating with other coaches, which is very important. For one thing, I've learned with multi-family investors, if you don't have the right team, you're gonna struggle. And it's the same in pretty much every business, but especially coaching influencer path and multi-family investors.

It is essential. And so for me, it's as you scale, you work less on the everyday stuff, operations stuff. You work more on the bigger and I'm excited at this point, I'm excited to be in person with people, be at events and support people in person. So I'll still be doing one-on-one coaching cuz I love it to some degree.

But a huge part of it is just scaling it. And this means that I have many more people that are potentially coming into my community and going into bigger events. And so that is an exciting new journey for me. So we'll see. We'll see what comes about. 

Suzy: No, that's awesome. So I'm gonna take the third question.

Oh, I'm gonna change it. Okay. Nevermind now. Oh, change it. We might do two of like three A and three B during the. 

Michael: Third question I have for you, Faisal, I'm not changing this up again, is what is one piece of advice you have for someone who wants to start looking, coaching, or getting involved in coaching? But I wanna add to that.

Suzy: Can I add to it? Cuz I was gonna do the same thing. Okay. So I wanna, like society has created, you know, like an introvert and an extrovert. So, Although I don't like those words. What is one piece of advice you have for somebody who is like, oh my gosh, I don't know if I'm ready for a community? Whereas there's the other side where somebody's like, I have a community.

Although they might not serve that individual's needs, why would I need a coaching one? Does that make sense? 

Faisal: Yeah, it does. It does. Okay, cool. Thank, thank you. I love these questions. So I, I think a lot of coaches will either do a free strategy session or a very, they will charge very small just for somebody to see what coaching is, cuz most people don't understand what coaching is and it's usually they think that I'm sitting there giving people advice.

That's not what actually happens. It's, it's more of an exploratory journey and you have to go through the experience to find out. So I really encourage somebody if they're interested in it. One session could completely transform your way of thinking and how you approach your life, let alone if you're part of a community or, or a thing.

But try it out. Forget about what everybody else has said. Just find out who we feel aligned with. Reach out to me if you want that. I have a community of coaches as well, whether it's me or somebody else, I'll get you connected with the right coaches. Just try it out, whether it's in a group format or one-on-one.

Once you, and then that's how Suzy got involved. Like Suzy showed up to a live coaching session that I did. Yeah. And I still remember her chopping. I still remember that we chopping at something. 

Suzy: Yeah, I was making dinner. Perfect. Question. Yeah yeah.

Faisal: I was like, oh, I want Suzy to be part of this community, and, so that introvert-extrovert thing.

So people there's this idea of, I think Doc Dr. Jordan Peterson talks about this is like, there's low-resolution thinking and there's high-resolution thinking. So low resolution. If you don't know much about a subject, you will just assume a bunch of stuff around, right? Yes. So the introvert expert, it's a spectrum.

In fact, there's omnivert and all sorts of other things in there. So, Very few people are at the extreme end, but because they're on, for example, I'm 60% introverted. As much as am I not seeing that, I am. But it doesn't mean that I can't be a certain way. It doesn't stop you from being around people.

I think it comes down to, whether are you in the right community That feels aligned with you? Because if people accept you for who you are and they support your growth at that level, I guarantee you, you will go in there and you will be excited. You will gain energy from it. You will do a, you will still need your alone time if you're an introvert, but you will still be excited to be around them.

But if you are around the wrong community, which a lot of people might be, You will feel disconnected. You will tell yourself, oh, I'm an introvert. I can't be around people. I don't want to be around people because I don't feel understood. You don't feel accepted, you don't feel supported. It's a thing, but it's not a thing that boxes you in.

You can move through that spectrum. You can grow, and you can do a lot of things within that. So a lot of people use it as a way to kind of limit themselves. it's similar to almost every client I talk to saying I feel like I have ADHD or ADD I'm like, have you been diagnosed? no. I self-diagnosed.

Everybody's self-diagnosed these days, but they have no idea what that means. And then like they will say, well, I have gained a lot of weight. I think I have a thyroid issue. Have you gotten that check? No. They've got self-diagnosed and they've accepted the fact and it's medical, the perspective that they don't have.

But they've given themselves, similar to the psychological side, don't limit yourself. That's all I will say Based on a personality disposition that you might have. 

Suzy: Yeah, and I wanna even add to that cuz like, it's huge. It's huge. It's huge. Like before Michael and I got into real estate investing, I didn't even, I would not have even had time to think about coaching.

Like, so when I went into it, I was still nervous. This is brand new. I don't know what to do. And even if you feel out of place, For like the first couple sessions, I wish I could really like put words to all these amazing feelings that I have about it. It's just worth any sort of patience because it is, it will be brand new or it could be brand new.

And with anything brand new, like even with your first couple of times, you still might have that scared feeling deep inside, even though you've told yourself that you like it, you still might have that inside, but once you allow yourself. To be like, okay, the people who are also in this with me, Are gaining so much out of this, like let's look at it through a brand new lens, like, your life changes.

I 100% believe in that. Yeah. 

Faisal: Yeah, me too. I've gone through the process too, and, and I'll give one caveat because coaching is such a, like a booming industry, and it's not standardized. There are no regulations around it. and that's actually something I'm working on with our community coaching master community.

We want to set standards around how coaches could be better and better serve people as, as the, because this we're essentially coaches now is pioneers of the field. It, it didn't exist a few years and so you find that, that a lot of people are going into it. Not everybody might be, they might go for it because of a business or because they think that this is a that's coaching and they had their own conception of it.

But there are very actually key principles of coaching that, you could learn on your own or you could learn it in a certification or from a mentor or from another coach, that if you're not applying some of those things, then it becomes a lot about advice-giving. And I've run into, clients have come to me and they're very standoffish, and I find out, they're like, oh, I went through a coaching experience and it was, it wasn't that great.

And then I asked them what that was like, and I, and I'm like, oh, that, that's not coaching. That was just mentorship. And that was just advice. So then I have to take them through an experience for them to see what it actually is. And then when they see it, they're like, oh, this is so different. So that would be a caveat on how we find out about that.

Connect with coaches who are actually, have been doing this and who are connected to the coaching community. Just like investors, you wouldn't want to talk to an investor that nobody knows about. They, they're connected to the rest of the investors. They are part of stuff. You wanna know that they're doing stuff, they're connected, they're part of the industry, they're getting feedback.

It's not just some random coach alone. I'm not saying that those coaches don't exist. who are really good and they're in their own corner. But I'm saying it's much more likely that a coach that will be able to support you as a coach, that's more connected to the coaching community and world.

Suzy: Yeah, totally. And if you are interested. In connecting with Faisal, you have to wait until the end of the episode to find out where to get ahold of him because we still have one more question left, which is, if you had limited resources available to you, how would you leave an impact? 

Faisal: Limited resources?

Suzy: Oh, unlimited. Sorry. 

Faisal: I think I'd be doing the same thing that I'm doing right now, just at a bigger scale, and, and that's what I'm working towards is for, for me, I think the most especially the pandemic taught me a lot in terms of how, if anything we know for sure is that our leaders failed everybody, like, like every corner of the world.

And like we know that they didn't know what they were doing, but they weren't vulnerable enough to say that I don't know what I'm doing. They basically made up a bunch of stories and I think leadership makes a huge difference in families and communities and organizations in the world. So my goal, it doesn't matter what organization, what's family, what community is, whether I'm working with parents, whether I'm working with CEOs, whether I'm working with an athlete, whatever it might be, or multi-family real estate investors.

My goal is to help them understand the sense of ownership and responsibility that comes with being at a level of awareness. It's not like this thing about, oh my God, I am this big thing to do stuff. No, you don't need to take yourself seriously to be a leader, you just need to understand that there are a lot of people relying on you, and there's a level of integrity and congruency that comes into the picture that is very, very hard to practice.

It includes me too. And that requires consistent work. That requires consistent looking at your own shit. looking at what your biases are and not dumping it, all over your family, your community, or the world, and making it seem like it's the object. Or anything like that. So for me, my goal is to help leaders understand that, be a little bit more humble, but understand that there there is a lot of power that you have.

That you can leverage for good or you can leverage to take people in the wrong direction. and that influence can be very powerful. And unfortunately, a lot of people develop influence because of the context circumstances. As Elon Musk pointed out, he's like, there, he was talking about a possible recession.

There's money that has been raining on a lot of fools. It's like maybe this recession is needed. So a lot of people have power and influence, but they're not using it the right way, in every part of the world. So my goal is to, one, support those leaders to actually build communities.

that hold these leaders accountable. But everybody is being empowered to be leaders in their own right to support each other, collaborate and move forward. Create something, not because somebody told you so, but because we've all come to a decision that makes sense for the community, for the organization, and all sorts of things. So I'd be doing the same exact thing just at, probably a bigger scale. 

Suzy: No, and I like that. I especially like how you talked about leaders being vulnerable, cuz that's, that's hard. for, anyone, but to become a great leader, you need to be vulnerable. So thank you. That was like, I was like, oh, that was a great reminder.

Even just as a normal human 

Faisal: we're all normal. At some point, we get, it gets in our head that we're leaders and we should be different. No, we need to show the human. And people know this, like people have a very good bullshit radar. They just don't acknowledge it. Yeah. It was like they will go and listen to somebody, like, think about sitting in a sales conversation with somebody who's like a sleazy person or a, a leader at a politician talking who you know is not practicing what he's saying.

you know that it's bullshit but you still buy it because you hear it over and over and over and over and news agencies, marketing agencies, they all know that. All they have to do is put it in front of you a few times, scare you a few times, and then you'll believe it. 

Suzy: Mm-hmm. which is a bummer, unfortunately 

Michael: So thank you so much, Faisal. Before we end the show, would you mind sharing with the listeners how they can best get ahold of you? 

Faisal: Yes, so the main place is my name. and you can go to my website. You can book an intro call with me. I don't charge for that.

It's 30 minutes. If you wanted to explore what coaching means to you. To you, even if it's not for you to come to me. As I said, I have access to a large community of coaches. I support coaches too. I can get you connected with the right coach and definitely sign up for the newsletter. I'll share another link with you guys too.

I have multiple events coming up, so one coaching session is one thing, but if you go through an intensive program, whether it's a retreat or multiple days, it can really kind of change your paradigm around how think and to manage your life, but more importantly, being around the right people can completely transform you around the right community of people who are thinking at your level.

All of a sudden you realize, holy shoot, where have all these people been? Mm-hmm. all my life because this, this is my people. All of a sudden you find out that, oh, You are more of an extrovert than you thought you were or you're more of an introvert than you thought you were, cuz you, oh, a sudden you become much more introspective about a lot of the stuff.

So I definitely recommend joining us. I'll share one of the links. So our retreat link is ready. I'll share that with Suzy. It is just, so we're doing a webinar, I think on the 27th for that. So just join us in there. I would add value similar to what I did with you, Suzy. We will be doing a vision building, but also we'll share the details of the webinar.

It's limited spots for all these events. If you feel like it feels aligned, then join us. I'd love to meet you in person and grow together. 

Suzy: Yeah, and please, if anything like please just book an introductory call because like, As Faisal said, if the match isn't there, he will guide you in the right direction.

Because that's the whole point also is to like, for Fasial to be vulnerable and be like, you know what? Like, I don't know for a good match, but I think you'd be a great match with this coach over here. And that's huge, right? Most people wanna just gobble it up and be like, no, I think you're a good fit because I'll get paid.

No, no, no, no, no. Like Faisal will never do that to you, never in a million years. So please, if anything, please book that call and definitely look into his events because I was not fortunate enough to be able to attend any yet. But one day you will be. Yeah, yeah. No, I will be. And so thank you. Thank you again for joining us.

It's truly been a pleasure today. 

Faisal: Yeah, it's been an honor. Thank you both for, such an amazing and fun conversation. 

Michael: Yeah, absolutely. So until next time, explore more! Adventure awaits.  


Check out Suzy and Michaels's YouTube channel  The Adventures of a Real Estate Investor at -- @adventurousREI  

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