Mastering One's Life PurposeJan 19, 2024
In today's fast-paced world, where distractions abound and choices overwhelm, finding a sense of purpose can be a transformative journey. Understanding why purpose is important, exploring the different types of purpose, and discovering how to live purposefully can lead to a life filled with meaning and fulfillment. In this blog post, we will delve deeper into the concept of purpose and explore how it can shape our lives.
Why Purpose is Important:
Purpose provides direction and structure to our lives. It answers the fundamental question of why we exist and what truly matters to us. When we have a sense of purpose, we feel connected to something larger than ourselves, whether it be a grand scheme of things, a higher power, or our own unique philosophy of life. Purpose gives us a compass, guiding our choices and actions, and helping us prioritize our values. It infuses our lives with a sense of simplicity and clarity.
The Three Types of Purpose:
- Existential Purpose:
Existential purpose is the deep, call-to-action type of purpose many individuals strive to find. It is the sense of being called to do something, to fulfill a higher mission, and to make a meaningful impact on the world. Connecting with this type of purpose allows us to flow with life, feel part of something greater, and make peace with our existence. It can be rooted in religious or philosophical beliefs or a personal sense of connection with the universe.
- Purpose of Choice:
The purpose of choice involves deciding what matters to us and what we want to dedicate our time and energy to. It is the purpose we assign to ourselves, independent of external expectations or societal pressures. This purpose can be focused on careers, hobbies, relationships, or any area of life that brings us joy and fulfillment. By consciously choosing our purpose, we cultivate a meaningful life based on our passions and interests.
- Moment-to-Moment Purpose:
Living purposefully in every moment is about being present and engaged with our lives. It requires us to avoid running away from our pain or seeking constant distractions. By embracing the present moment, we find meaning and purpose in even the simplest activities, whether it's enjoying a cup of coffee or dedicating ourselves to a task. Living purposefully enables us to appreciate the journey and find daily fulfillment.
Combining Passion and Service:
The formula for a fulfilled life lies in the connection between our passions and the desire to serve others. When we identify our passions and genuine interests, and align them with our intent to make a positive impact on the lives of others, we create a powerful combination. This alignment creates a sense of purpose and fulfillment as we develop expertise in areas we are passionate about and find joy in helping others. Living a life driven by passion and service brings a deep sense of connection and meaning.
Understanding the significance of purpose and embracing it in our lives can transform our entire existence. Purpose gives us direction and structure, helps us navigate through challenges, and allows us to experience a fulfilled life. By finding our own unique sense of purpose, embracing our passions, and learning to live purposefully in every moment, we unlock the power to create a life worth living. Take the time to reflect on what truly matters to you and how you can align your passions with serving others. Your journey towards purpose mastery is a journey towards a more meaningful and fulfilled life.
We're going to cover a few things today. This is more of a training session for the next few minutes.
[00:00:06] Why purpose is important? Why do we care about purpose? Why do you need to figure it out? Why do you need to spend time to figure it out? , I'll talk a little bit about three types of purpose, generally speaking, and how they show up in your life. , and ultimately, what does it take to create a fulfilled life?
[00:00:25] We're going to go deeper into that as well. So before I get started, I want to share a quick story around this around my own life. I know, I know the difference between when I was not purposeful. I didn't have a sense of purpose versus now, and it's a huge, huge difference. So here's what it looked like when I didn't feel like I had a sense of purpose.
[00:00:48] What it looked like was my mind was constantly running towards trying to figure out and I grew up in a religious world. So for context, like, what do I believe? Is there a God? What is going on in my existential life? What's happening? What do I need?
[00:01:01] There were a lot of questions. Nothing wrong with questions. I think curiosity is really important. But the problem was, there was a lot of confusion and my day to day life. What should I focus on? What should I do? I didn't know what to focus on. What is the thing that matters to me versus what matters to others?
[00:01:17] What is the thing that I should choose that I want to work on long term versus something else? There were so many options and sometimes having too many options actually creates anxiety, anxiousness. We live in the age of information where there's so many ways to do. Things, but most people feel overwhelmed and anxious.
[00:01:38] And I'm not even talking about now. I'm talking about 20 years ago when I was struggling to figure out who I was, my identity and I didn't have 30. I could do certain things. For example, I jumped into the world of engineering. Why did I do that? Well, more than likely because that's what my Parents wanted to some degree.
[00:01:57] I thought I was going opposite to that, but that's [00:02:00] that's what what I was taught. And I went into that spend about four or five years came out of it started working. I don't see myself doing this. I don't care how successful I'll be. I think I'm going to be miserable, but I didn't know what the next step was.
[00:02:13] So I had to do a lot of digging around that. And I want to share a couple other case studies around this. So I've had clients who have started working with with me and they've jumped into the investing world. For example, after a few months of working together, they realized that they shouldn't have even been in the investing world in the normal, like real estate investors.
[00:02:34] They completely switched track. Or I've had clients who have been doing a normal job following DAPA and all of a sudden they, they go through a few months of coaching completely shift trajectory. And it's not just about your career path. It's also. The kind of lifestyle you love. I have had clients who within a few months completely moved to a different part of the country or a different part of the world and create a new life.
[00:02:59] Why? Because they realized that pretty much everything that they did was because of certain expectations they felt like they needed to fulfill in their life rather than what truly mattered to them. And that, that, what they also realized was that In their day-to-Day life. The, the, the sense of overload and energy was not really what they were doing.
[00:03:18] 'cause what they were doing was not hard. As much as what they were dealing with internally. They didn't feel fulfilled in their day-to-day life. They didn't feel like what they were doing mattered to them. They didn't feel, even in the moment by moment choices that they had was their choices. And that's what it boils down to is that it actually affects your performance in your day to day life.
[00:03:41] And for me, the transition has been is that now, and I want to give this caveat because a lot of people hearing this, they kind of make up these things in their mind, but nobody's life is going to be perfect. My life is not perfect. I have challenges just like anybody else. I have personal challenges. I have family [00:04:00] challenges.
[00:04:00] I have so many things. But then it's So what am I promoting here? What I'm promoting is whatever is in my life at this point in my life that I can think off is based on my choices. There are unpredictabilities in my life that happen that I couldn't have predicted, but even those are based on my choices, the way I had envisioned this life to be, how can I say with so much certainty that you can create that life, whether there's challenges, there's positive, there's negative, but it's my life.
[00:04:28] It's very meaningful to me. I don't have to wake up most days at 6 a. m. in the morning. I do because I'm excited to wake up. I'm excited to do the things that I do. I don't have to spend hours and stay up longer. I was talking to my wife the other day.. We had a difference in how we were looking at tiredness and exhaustion.
[00:04:49] And she's like, well, you shouldn't be tired with a lot of the things that you're doing. I'm like, you know what? I'm tired with a lot of the things. I'm tired with being with my kids. Sometimes I'm tired with my business. A lot of times. But to me, that's not a negative thing. I want to be tired by those things because I've dedicated my life to those things.
[00:05:05] I love those things. I love my business. I love my family. I love my growth. Those things make me tired. But by the end of the day, when I can put my head down on the pillow, I'm gone. I'm so exhausted that I'm gone. Like I did something powerful. I did something meaningful today that mattered to me. And I can tell you it's a lot of work to figure these things out.
[00:05:29] But once you do, when life is so short, it's going to go by so fast. It's one of those paradoxes that life kind of feels logging, but it also feels really short. I can't tell you how fast the past 10 years have gone. And the past 10 years, there's been a lot of growth for me. From starting multiple businesses to starting a whole family, multiple kids to to completely shifting my identity in different ways to connecting to people [00:06:00] from around the world to going to different parts of the world to meeting so many amazing people.
[00:06:04] I could not have imagined that in the beginning stages of it in the beginning. All I knew was that I needed to get through that initial struggle. But you know what? Struggle is always there. So what made it sustainable? What has made it sustainable to this point? And it will long term is actually a sense of purpose.
[00:06:23] So I want this to be solidified. That's why I'm spending a little bit of time in there with you. Is that Do you have a sense of purpose, whether that's an existential sense of purpose, a purpose that you've actually and we'll talk about that assigned for yourself because you can do that. You can choose that or at the moment to moment sense of purpose that every moment that I'm spending is what I wanted to spend on.
[00:06:49] This is my life. I'm happy with what I'm doing. I'm not resisting life. I'm not fighting life because that becomes a life filled with suffering when you start to fight life. So let's go through a couple of these things. So we covered the Y part. Let's cover the three types of purpose, why it's important for you to think about all three of those.
[00:07:11] And if you are somebody who is intentional, who wants to create a life by design, you need to consider these things in your life. And then at the end, we'll, we'll talk a little bit about what brings fulfillment. What is it? It's a good formula to think about when you're thinking about a life well lived, a fulfilled life.
[00:07:29] So let's go to three types of purpose. First one. This is the one that's very interesting. This is the one that most people hear about. This is the one that's too much for a lot of people to hear about. This is the one that feels too much for a lot of people to, but actually everybody has access to it. And that's the existential type of purpose, or the kind of purpose that you hear people say, I feel called to do this thing.
[00:07:58] And, and that's very important [00:08:00] for you to understand. And it's not just for individuals to ask this questions. Human beings have been been asking this question for a long, long time for thousands of years. This is why we have religions. This is why we have philosophies of different kinds.
[00:08:14] Why is this important? The reason why it's important for you to come up with your own philosophy of life for you to figure out what you feel called to be and to do. It's not just to do. It's also called to be. That makes a huge difference in how you show up. Because as soon as you feel connected with the grand scheme of things, when you make peace with the universe, when you make peace with God or when you make peace with your own existence, however you want to look at it, then you start to flow with life versus against life.
[00:08:46] You, you feel like you're part of something bigger. But if you feel like you're kind of, and this is the, this is a big collective challenge that we're dealing with as well. Because as human beings, we're also evolving. If you look at how human beings think now is very different than how human beings used to think a while ago.
[00:09:04] So, for example, major changes in the way that we think about life in the 20th century, a lot of thinking went to secularism. Well, it doesn't matter whether there was. Proof or not, a lot of thinking went towards secularism. So which means that a lot of the world, even those who are religious, they tend to believe in the randomness of things rather than a cosmos or a universe that's more intelligently set up that has some kind of pattern system.
[00:09:34] Even though science deals with a lot of patterns, they have concluded that things are random. Things happen all over, all over the place without any kind of meaning or purpose or anything like that. But it matters. So, at that level, who knows? I don't know. But personally, you need to.
[00:09:51] Make sense of it in your own life, whether it is your purpose connects to God, whether your purpose connects to the work that you're doing, whether [00:10:00] your purpose connects to how the universe is organized, you're an aspect of that. It doesn't matter. You need to understand what that philosophy of yours is.
[00:10:08] It cannot be completely. The sense of, you know what? Nothing matters. Everything is whatever. And I'm just gonna float through life. That's not how human beings operate. If you haven't read this book man's search for meaning Dr Victor Hankel definitely read that book is it's a very interesting book.
[00:10:30] A lot of people have been influenced by that. He actually created a type of therapy called I think logos therapy, which is associated with a purpose that can heal a lot of things. So this is why one of the most positive aspects of, for example, religions is a sense of purpose. A lot of people who are connected to religions are connected to community, connected to a bigger scheme of life.
[00:10:53] They tend to live a better quality of life. Now, of course, there are exceptions to that, but what, what does that mean? .
[00:10:59] They tend to have a direction and structure, and their life feels more simple. And I've lived all sorts of life. I came from a religious background, and then I completely left that.
[00:11:09] And then I've, I've kind of developed a mix of the two where I do have faith. I do believe in a higher power, but I have kind of created my own structure around it. You could say you're on my own Rules and principles around it that are that actually pulls out a lot of the things from world religions and whatever religion I grew up in.
[00:11:29] So what does that mean? Even though I've gone through that journey of disconnecting from religion for a while, and then having to create my own view of the world, I still have had to rely on that. Perspective that human beings have been seeking for a long time. I'm not saying you should be religious or not.
[00:11:46] That's completely your choice. It's your life. But figure out what does your life mean? And for sometimes that's a longer journey, but a lot of times it's not that long as as long as you think if you dedicate your time. So a couple [00:12:00] of things in there. One that all that will also determine how you show up in your work, your values, that also determines how you show up in your family, that also determines how you show up with other people, and this does, I want to insist on a couple of things, does not have to be connected to a specific religion, you can take principles and values from it, but it can be your own philosophy of life.
[00:12:21] There are a lot of people who have developed that. It's a harder thing to do, but you can do that. So what does it do? It helps you create a compass. It helps you create a simplicity. So you're not constantly all over the place. That one, that's one piece of it. The second one is the purpose and the third one is the most important one.
[00:12:41] So let's just stay with me because that's going to determine the day to day quality of life. But the second one is the purpose that we decide. And that's very interesting because human beings are, as far as we know, are the only species on earth where we tend to think about not only we know that we exist, but we ask why we exist and we know that we exist, that we exist. We can observe our own existence and it becomes very mind tripping when you think about it.
[00:13:10] And we are aware that we're going to die, or at least in this existence, we're going to die. So that tends to create a weird thing, but it also gives us a sense of power. So what is that? That means that we can pick and choose what are the things that matter to us. Now, I would say that if you have a sense of existential or a sense of bigger existential purpose, you can actually pick the second one easier, but it doesn't have to be.
[00:13:36] You can actually decide today that, you know what, my life is going to be about dedication to these people. My life is going to be dedication to my family. It's going to be dedication to this work. A lot of people do that. Even people who are completely secular. Think about scientists. Think about people who do non profit things.
[00:13:53] People who do all sorts of amazing things out in the world, but they decide that this is meaningful to me. For some [00:14:00] reason, they connect to a part of themselves that, Hey, you know what? Feeding the hungry is meaningful to me. Going out there and reporting war crimes are meaningful to me. Dedicating my life to understanding the cosmos is meaningful to me.
[00:14:15] They're dedicating myself to understanding the human body is meaningful to me and sharing that knowledge. So you can actually decide that when you decide that And when you dedicate your time, long periods of time, you put an effort, you develop expertise, it brings a sense of day to day purpose for you.
[00:14:33] Your life becomes meaningful, at least in that arena, at least in that thing that you've decided, whether it's with your family, whether it's with other people or your community, you can actually decide that that that tends to give human beings a sense of connection, a sense of they're part of something bigger, that they're meant to do something important.
[00:14:54] So that's the second piece of it. The third one is the simplest one is the one that most people will miss
[00:15:00] living purposefully. And this is the one that's moment to moment. So ask yourself, Am I trying to run away from my life by distracting myself with all sorts of things, whether that be influence, such as alcohol, drugs, all sorts of things, or take talk or or success or relationships. Anything can become a distraction if that thing is an escape from you feeling the moment seeing the moment now.
[00:15:36] All of us are gonna to some degree escape, but I'm talking about chronic addiction to certain things. Now, the reason why addiction comes into play is because we're usually running away from an internal pain. The reason why a lot of people can't live moment to moment. We've heard these, these ideas presence.
[00:15:56] A lot of people say, well, live in the present. Well, then give people the [00:16:00] tools to not run away from, from their pain. A lot of even religion fails in this area because it constantly tells people to be grateful to live in the moment. Sometimes it gives tools, but a lot of times they, they don't give people the tools to deal with their pain.
[00:16:16] directly, but they tell people constantly to stop running away, stop drinking, stop going for drugs, stop doing all these things that are distractions. The only major thing that I think is really powerful that that, for example, religious institutions do well is to give you a bigger direction in life, a sense of purpose, sense of meaning, but beyond that, in your day to day life, they don't teach you how to deal with the pain that you're going through and that's something I've had to learn on my own and from a lot of people not on my own.
[00:16:45] Like, I had to learn from a lot of amazing teachers, coaches, mentors, That I've been involved with is how can I deal with my pain? So I don't have to run away from my life. How can I be in my life? And when you can be in the present moment, when every moment becomes meaningful, whether that is enjoying your coffee, which I will or, just the fact that I'm here doing training, somebody is going to get value out of it. That's so meaningful for me. That's so purposeful for me. That means a lot to me. And actually I'm, I'm very sick today. The weekend I was out, but yesterday I made sure I rest throughout the day. So I was ready for today.
[00:17:26] I had two major trainings set up and I'd plan for it. The other one was even bigger than this one for weeks out. We've been trained. We've been preparing to do this webinar. But this was so important for me that I had to get my body to get ready, and I'm actually fairly good. It's funny how yesterday I was completely incapacitated, today I'm getting up and doing everything.
[00:17:47] And my wife is watching me when I was going back and forth, like, you look pretty good today. Like, I'm back to work. I don't know. Because she had to take care of me the whole day yesterday. So and then what [00:18:00] I'm sharing here is that when, when the things. In your life are important. Even your body will cooperate with you.
[00:18:06] Even your body will get better. And we're learning that there's a huge connection between well being in a sense of purpose is a huge connection between well being and and your psychological state. In fact, there are fields in biology that are coming around, like psycho neural, neural immunology that's connected to that that we're learning.
[00:18:27] Behavioral epigenetics that we're learning about. That's completely connected to our mind. Our state of mind determines our health and well being. By the way, as a side note, people, this idea of retirement, a lot of people, especially men who associate a lot of sense of purpose with their work when they retire, their health declined steeply.
[00:18:47] This idea of retirement is very new. It's only since 1950s. So we haven't even experimented with this long. So they lose their sense of purpose. But when you go to ancient times, what used to happen was the, the elders of the family actually had more responsibility on them, not physical responsibility, but they were the guides, the mentors, the advisors, , they passed on the tradition and wisdom of the tribe.
[00:19:11] So they used to have a bigger responsibility. They had to grow. They had to evolve from their own ego that has gone away. So in the Western world, when you get to a certain age, 65 70, whatever you retire, basically, you don't have a sense of purpose. So what happens when you after the 1st 6 months, 1 year, 2 years of having fun, your health declines because your body knows that you don't need to do anything anymore.
[00:19:35] You've kind of been you're outside of your community. You're outside of what you're meant to do. And then the final point, I want to quickly explain here. So I said in the beginning that there is a formula around this whole thing. As I've been talking about purpose, I've been cluing into this, but I haven't been explicitly saying this.
[00:19:56] Your purpose is actually not that much connected to you. [00:20:00] It's actually much more connected to other people and to the world around you. Why? That's by the nature of, Our existence as human beings. By the nature of how we are, we are a social species. As soon as you take out the social component, a lot of things become empty.
[00:20:17] If, right now, if you take away my my family, if you take away my friends, if you take away my business partners, if you take away my clients and you leave me in my, life with all the tools that I have, I will still feel a disconnection in my life. With all the ways that I have learned, I will still feel disconnected.
[00:20:38] I would, I wouldn't want those things in my life. Now, is it possible for some people to go beyond that? Yes, there have been some individuals in the world that have been able to do that. But this is the formula here.
[00:20:49] Maybe this will change for me. Maybe this won't. But so far, I feel like
[00:20:56] you can understand this. A lot of things will change for you. There's your passion, the things that truly matter to you internally. The things that that you you're curious about the things that you're infatuated with the things that that you love. For example, I love history. I love mythology. I love human behavior.
[00:21:17] I love understanding people in their thought processes, how it affects their behavior. I love being in nature. I love learning how nature operates. I love studying the cosmos. I love these things and I'm deep. I love studying religion. I've I've loved that. And the more I've looked past all the way in the past.
[00:21:37] Since six years old, I've been interested in the these things. I just didn't know to stick to these things. A lot of times I moved away. Then I went back because there was an internal drive. I don't know why. Maybe that's the thing that I came with here and those were the things that I was interested in.
[00:21:53] But I had certain passions in my life that, things that were, I was interested in. I have two daughter daughters. You can [00:22:00] clearly see from the time that they were here, they were interested in certain things. My older daughter is very intellectual, that she is interested in ideas, thoughts. My younger daughter, even though she's a little bit younger, she's four, the older was seven.
[00:22:13] The four year old, she's much more interested in doing things, using her hands. She's more artistic. My older daughter, even though she is artistic to some degree, but she's more interested in ideas since she was a child. She always had questions. She's she's a lot like me in some senses. But so you either the environment either nurtures that or breaks that down for me, it kind of went all over the place.
[00:22:38] It didn't not nurture that part of me in the beginning stages. So, had I continued that passion from the beginning, I feel like I would have, I would have done something with that to create, turn it into a sense of purpose, which means that I would have helped people with that knowledge. early on. But I figured out the late twenties that I had certain things that I needed to go towards, regardless of whether they paid me or not.
[00:23:05] And that is a formula. I feel like if you can combine your passions With your sense of helping other people, which is connected to your purpose that creates a fulfilled life. So your passion and service. creates a fulfilled life. Just those two things. If you can get in touch with what truly matters to you, what do you care about?
[00:23:28] Not because somebody says you're going to make more money and that not because somebody says, and this is the downside of our world. Like when I was in high school, I was asked, look at these charts of how much people make in each job category. Instead of that, I should have been asked what matters to you.
[00:23:45] Not not give me charts of how much people I literally was looking for and this like it was such a broken thought process I don't know who came up with that But we were look literally looking at charts of oh as an engineer you can make a hundred thousand in the first three four or five [00:24:00] years as a plumber you can make this much as Technician you can make this much as a nurse you can make this Who cares?
[00:24:08] Are there people who do something completely different who make a shit ton of money and they feel fulfilled in their life or they make half as much money and they feel satisfied and connected to their life? I personally believe that if you enjoy something, and it's not just my belief, we know this through performance studies as well, that if you're personally curious, you have an internal drive to learn something and you want to dedicate your time and energy to that, you do that long enough, you become an expert in that area.
[00:24:38] Naturally, people will seek your guidance. Now you can turn that into a business or you can go for a better job or whatever. So, My idea became as I built my life is that how can I combine my passion with and turn it into something Fulfilling by making it a sense of giving it a sense of purpose How can I?
[00:24:59] Learn the thing that I'm learning but also serve other people with that so I can have a fulfilled life and I do So far, it has worked out. Maybe it won't later on. And I've also learned this from some amazing mentors and some amazing scholars in the world and philosophers that if you really want to live, we've heard these ideas that if you don't want to work a day in your life, do the thing that you love.
[00:25:23] If you want to live a life worth living, live your own life, not other people's expectations of what your life looks like. Because what ends up happening is that you take full responsibility for your life. The good, the bad, the ugly. Even if there are challenges, there are your challenges. But if you don't take full responsibility, what ends up happening is that you build resentment, you create hatred, you become a victim in the process because you think that everybody else is creating your life.
[00:25:52] And maybe that's true because you never made your own choices as an adult. So I'll leave it at that. And, as a, [00:26:00] as a reminder, understand that your purpose drives a lot of your performance. A lot of your energy is going to come from that. Those three types of purpose that you're what you feel called to do what you make your purpose to be and how you live purposefully in moment to moment.
[00:26:17] They all matter. So consider those areas. And finally, if you really want a life, That live a life worth living, try to find out what that passion is and connected with service towards others. And you will find out that your everyday life is just as exciting as. You doing anything else that's extraordinary for me, my moment to moment life is just as extraordinary as the big things that happen in my life.
[00:26:42] , and , that allows me to be in my life versus be disengaged most of the time. And that has also allowed me to heal as a human being that has also allowed me to be curious and learn to grow and the more I grow, the more. I can connect with others around me. The more I can serve other people around me, the more I can build cool things.
[00:27:01] And hopefully I get to find bigger and bigger purposes for myself and serve other people around. And that's that's that's what I've sensed. And so far, that's what I've experienced so far. And like I said, that could change. I don't know. And I'd love to hear from you, whoever is watching this on Facebook live or in the training, please share in the in the chapel.
[00:27:24] What was your insight? How have you manage is purpose and important aspect of your life or have you been able to figure out a life without a sense of purpose? I'm open to that as well. Let us know below what your biggest insight was.
Stay connected with news and updates!
Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from our team.
Don't worry, your information will not be shared.
We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.