Understanding Confidence: Skills, Roles, and Self-Belief

Confidence, a concept that intertwines with our daily lives in ways we may not always realize. In the quest for self-assurance and belief in oneself, we often navigate through various levels of confidence. Join me on a reflective journey as we uncover the layers of confidence and delve into the essence of self-belief.

Exploring Three Types of Confidence:
As we embark on this exploration, let's first understand the three fundamental types of confidence that shape our perceptions and actions: skill confidence, role confidence, and self-confidence.

Skill Confidence:
Skill confidence stems from our proficiency in a specific area, where our capabilities shine bright, and we feel at ease within our comfort zone. Whether it's mastering mathematical calculations, excelling in communication, or navigating through challenging situations, skill confidence empowers us to tackle tasks with poise and certainty.

However, the limitation of skill confidence arises when we step out of our familiar territory and encounter unfamiliar domains. The shift from competence to insecurity highlights the dynamic nature of confidence and the need to adapt and grow beyond our known capabilities.

Role Confidence:
Moving beyond skill confidence, role confidence emerges as we immerse ourselves in specific identities or professions. Whether as a teacher, entrepreneur, or parent, each role embodies a unique set of skills and responsibilities that shape our self-assurance within that context.

The evolution of role confidence reflects our journey of growth and development in navigating diverse roles and responsibilities. Embracing the multifaceted aspects of our identities, role confidence serves as a guiding light in embracing challenges and fostering a sense of purpose within our chosen paths.

Self-Confidence:
At the core of confidence lies self-confidence, a profound trust in our innate abilities and capacity to overcome obstacles. Rooted in self-belief and resilience, self-confidence transcends external validations and taps into the intrinsic power of self-trust.

Reconnecting with our inherent confidence, akin to the unwavering curiosity and resilience of children, rekindles the spark of belief in our potential and capacity to learn and grow. Embracing self-confidence entails challenging self-doubt, nurturing self-compassion, and anchoring ourselves in our authentic essence.

The Essence of Confidence:
Delving deeper into the essence of confidence unveils a profound connection to the cosmos and the natural creative energy that permeates our existence. From stardust to the essence of creation, we embody the innate power to conquer challenges, adapt to transformations, and evolve into our fullest potential.

Embracing the transformative journey of confidence involves embracing uncertainty, questioning ingrained beliefs, and cultivating a deep sense of trust in our inner wisdom. As we align with the rhythm of the universe and tap into our innate creative force, we embark on a path of self-discovery and empowerment.

Conclusion:
In conclusion, the journey of confidence is a profound odyssey of self-exploration and growth. By unraveling the layers of skill confidence, role confidence, and self-confidence, we embark on a transformative quest towards self-assurance and authenticity.

May this reflective journey inspire you to cultivate a deeper sense of confidence, trust in your inner power, and embark on a path of self-discovery with unwavering belief in your potential. As we embrace the essence of confidence, may we illuminate our paths with courage, resilience, and a profound connection to the limitless possibilities within and around us.

Wishing you a journey filled with self-discovery, empowerment, and the unwavering belief in your innate capacity to shine brightly in the cosmic tapestry of life.

Hello, hello, hello. Today's training is on confidence. So excited to do this session with you guys, this training session. But before I go into this, I'll give you a little bit of a story around this. So for, for me, I always thought of as a young man, I always thought of confidence as I have to appear to be somehow to be confident in myself. It was a lot of, it was around the appearance and slowly as I gained experience in life where I started learning, Oh, maybe it's related to my skill sets, or maybe it's I have to.
[00:00:36] To learn to be confident in a specific role. We'll explore some of those areas, but what we'll do is we'll explore three types of confidence that we all kind of deal with on a general basis to give you some framework as to what levels of confidence there are and how you can develop your your confidence yourself.
[00:00:57] So let's start with the first one. And as we go through it, we'll explore confidence more and more as we move forward. Now, the first level of confidence is. skill confidence. And this is the one that we actually all do. We all have it to one degree or another because we're all skilled at something. It doesn't matter what it is.
[00:01:21] We're all skilled at something. Even it could be as simple as, I don't know, knowing how to do calculations really fast or being good at math or being good at really, really good at driving or being really good at talking to somebody or communicating or conversing or having a dialogue could be any kind of skillset.
[00:01:42] But if we're good at a specific skillset, we naturally feel confident , within that skill set. So that's our comfort area a lot of times. So we feel confident in that area. And a lot of, like I said, most of us have some kind of skill and within that [00:02:00] skill, no matter how unconfident we are in any other part of our life, we'll feel confident if somebody is, let's say, asking our help in that area.
[00:02:08] Or we feel like we wanna help somebody, we'll feel con confident to, to give that help or maybe not give that help. But we'll feel confident if it comes up, if it comes up that we need to calculate something or we need to have a conversation with somebody, or maybe we need to drive. In a very bad weather condition.
[00:02:29] We feel confident in the skill set of driving. Now, obviously, this, it applies to our own specific skill sets. So then here's the problem with skill confidence. The skill confidence is so important. specific to that skill set. As soon as you move out of that skill set and you go towards a different area, such as if you're very skilled at driving, you go and do something else, such as talking to somebody and you're not very good at conversing, that's a problem because then you just lost your confidence.
[00:03:04] Now it could be the other way around as well. And I'm just giving you a simple everyday example so we can all grasp it. So what is the next level of confidence? And that is role confidence. This is the kind of confidence that a lot of people develop as they get better in their career. Or usually it's career related for, for men or even for women if they've pursued a career for a while and they develop certain skill sets within that specific area and over time they feel confident about being in that role.
[00:03:43] So, for example, a role could be, let's say, your role as a real estate investor. You could be very confident in the different skill sets involved, but more specifically in your identity or role. When I say role, it's your [00:04:00] identity as a real estate investor or an entrepreneur or a teacher. You could be not confident at all in your life, but once you step into that role as a teacher, you're very confident.
[00:04:13] But then when I take you and put you in a different situation, you're not very confident. So what's happening? What's happening there is that we're confident in a specific role and the specific role comes up, comes with different skill sets. So a teacher doesn't just involve something like teaching a concept.
[00:04:30] It actually involves listening. It actually involves breaking down a material and it, it's helping people make sense of something, asking questions. So many things are involved in, in teaching grading, creating a framework structure for people to Grasp concepts, so many things involved in there, being able to communicate , with your students and give them feedback or get feedback from them.
[00:04:53] So that role requires a lot of things. Now that could be a personal role. You could be confident in your ability as a parent, but you're not, you might not be confident in your ability as an entrepreneur. That's a different role. Different identity. So as we develop confidence in different skill sets within that role, we develop a confidence in that role.
[00:05:17] And both of these ones connect to one idea. And this is an idea in psychology and high performance. And we call that idea Competence, confidence loop, the more competence we develop in a specific skill set area or in a specific role, the more competence we develop, the more confidence we develop, and that confidence in terms helps us be open enough to learn more, so it develops more competence and then more confidence.
[00:05:45] So there's a loop that goes on. While both of these areas are really good and it's very natural and you might have experienced this if you've ever started a job fresh, you've just gone into a career or a new job or a [00:06:00] new role, you don't feel very confident because you go in there like, I don't know what I'm doing.
[00:06:05] And then as you learn slowly, as you go through the learning curve, you develop the knowledge, the experience, the skill sets around it, and you feel more confident in a specific skill area or in that whole role or a major part of that role. All right, so now you have your skills, confidence and your role confidence.
[00:06:27] I bet. For you to be here in this group, in this community, you probably have certain skill sets that you feel confident in, and you probably have certain roles you feel confident in. And maybe you feel confident in all your roles in your comfort zone in your life. But now what happens if I take you and put you in a completely different role?
[00:06:49] So let's say you're a very experienced entrepreneur you are a great dad or mom but I take you and put you in a situation where you, I don't know, I put you with a bunch of strangers and need to figure, figure out something new, or you need to connect with these people. Now, part of it is that you're going to bring naturally some of those skill sets and role expertise with you, but how would you feel in that situation?
[00:07:17] And that's where A different area of confidence comes in and that's self confidence. And this, this I believe is the core of confidence and I actually tried to find out the actual definition for confidence and I found out a couple of definitions here and I'll read it to you. The feeling or belief that one can rely on, on someone or something.
[00:07:44] Or something firm trust. And I like this definition. Confidence is a state of being clear headed either that a hypothesis or prediction is correct or that a chosen course of action is the best or most effective. [00:08:00] And at the bottom of that, which I love is confidence comes from a Latin word. For dairy.
[00:08:07] Which means to trust, therefore having confidence and having trust in oneself. And the reason I repeated this is that people who are really confident in their life, regardless of how much they know or don't know, they have this kind of underlying belief that And then they even verbalize it in some ways.
[00:08:29] And they will say something like, I'm confident in my ability to figure things out. So if they go, let's say they were in some specific career for a long time. And after 20 years or so, they've had enough of it. And they're about to go into a different one. They will have this very natural confidence. Like, I don't know how any of this works, but I have this confident in myself to figure it out.
[00:08:51] I'll be fine in this area. It'll take me some time, but I'll figure it out. So there's this trust in oneself, and that is the hardest kind of confidence to develop. Now, here's the interesting thing about this. We all have this confidence within us. In fact, we're born with this confidence. And I'm going to go back to children because they are, as far as I know, the most natural state.
[00:09:20] If you've ever been around kids, they don't have to know particularly anything because, in fact, they don't know much about anything in this environment as they're born. So as they grow up, by the time they hit two or three or four or five years old, they start asking a lot of questions. It doesn't matter what you're doing.
[00:09:37] They won't hesitate to ask you. They will ask you like, Oh, what are you doing there? Oh, what's that? Why? Why do you do that? Okay. Can you show me? Can I try it?
[00:09:51] They're so curious. In fact, they're not, they don't doubt themselves at all that they're going to go and, and and see and see what it is. [00:10:00] And even if they can't figure it out, they'll be like, Oh, how do you do this? Show me. And they will try it in every which way. And it starts with walking. There's like a natural system where if you watch a child walk, they will fall a hundred times and they will get back up and walk.
[00:10:14] There's no doubt in that moment that they're gonna fall and just stay there. They'll get up. They'll even cry sometimes and fall and get hurt. Or it's something like learning how to draw or playing piano. They don't self doubt unless there's a parent or a teacher that kind of doubts them and put something negative on them.
[00:10:34] They'll keep trying. There's this innate confidence in themselves unless it's taken away from them. And unfortunately, for many of us, that confidence gets stripped away as we move forward. And a big part of the reason around that is that we are born into systems that teaches us to rely on the systems external to us more so than ourselves.
[00:11:01] So when we're going through our personal life, a lot of times our parents will kind of Tell us that owner trust me. I'm here to protect you. I'm here to take care of you. Listen to me. I found myself say that a lot of times and not a good thing. I would rather ideally get my child or children to help them maintain and amplify that trust in themselves to forget, figure things out to develop themselves, to to persevere, to, to move forward despite any kind of challenges.
[00:11:38] Instead of telling them, listen to me. I'd rather get them to listen to their own intuition, their own inner voice, their own internal compass. And the reason I, I know this is firstly because of my own experience. I've been taught most of my life to listen to all sorts of institutions from family institutions to government, [00:12:00] religious, scientific, educational, and every time I've seen that these institutions fail.
[00:12:11] The one thing. That I haven't seen fail is our internal self, even if we have disconnected with it, it's still there. Our core self is there still that confident. We just need to connect with it. And I know it sounds that cliche thing that, oh, just know who you are and trust yourself and you'll be fine. A lot of people say that, but how do you develop that?
[00:12:39] Part of it is that we need to learn to trust ourselves. We need to question every time where we, we rely on others more than ourselves. None of this means that we can't get help or support, but what it means is that do we doubt ourselves constantly? Do we put ourselves down? Do, are we hard on ourselves?
[00:12:59] Those are all signs of not feeling confident in who we are.
[00:13:03] And externally, it also shows up in the forms of all sorts of fears, like fear of losing something, fear of fear of not being enough, fear of not that process being too challenging, fear of not getting to an outcome, fear of not living up to some expectation. These are all symptoms of one simple thing that we've lost the ability to trust ourselves.
[00:13:36] But there's also a bigger concept here because whenever we talk about ourselves, what are we talking about? And this is something for you to explore one up level, but we are a natural aspect of this cosmos. of this universe as far as we can tell. We are made of stardust at the physical level. We're born off the same energy as a star, [00:14:00] as an earth, as the elements of earth, of elements of everything in this universe, earth, cosmos.
[00:14:08] I don't ever remember earth doubting itself or an acorn doubting itself to become an oak tree. Or a cloud doubting in its ability to rain
[00:14:23] or a sun doubting in its ability to shine. I know it sounds very poetic and cliche, but there are some powerful truths in there. And that is that we are born to create. We are born to deal with challenges. We're born and we have been, we have evolved to be something very powerful at an individual and collective level.
[00:14:47] If you need evidence for that, all you have to do is study human evolution, human history. You'll find that we've persevered quite a bit. We've beat odds at a collective species level. At group levels, at small tribe levels, we've beaten odds at an individual levels. Just think about your own life. How many things you've had to overcome to be where you are right now.
[00:15:11] Think about humans around the world dealing with so many crazy things from war, poverty, drought, challenges with disease. I mean, let's just look at last year, but we keep coming back around. What is it? What is that driving force within us? That is much deeper than our skill sets. That's much deeper than our roles.
[00:15:34] It goes back to our nature. And as soon as we develop an inkling of confidence in that nature, we develop a confidence in who we are at our core and where we move forward. It doesn't matter what role we go in. It doesn't matter how fearful we feel. We'll keep moving forward because we're curious. We know what we're capable of or what we can learn to be capable of.[00:16:00]
[00:16:00] And more importantly, it connects to a bigger scheme of things, the cosmos, that the natural scheme of things, that there is a natural creative energy that happens and we're connected to that. We are expressing that creative energy. I'm not saying that in a way for you to believe me, or it's a belief that I'm passing on to you.
[00:16:21] I'm saying this for you to. Observe and take a look around. There's a creative power in every element of nature. And you're that same, you are an element of nature. That power is there. That essence is there. All you have to do is connect with it. And how do you connect with it? Well, here are some few tips.
[00:16:44] One, do what you're doing right now. Keep learning. Spend time alone with yourself without distractions. Spend time with your emotions, spend time noticing your body, spend time noticing your thoughts. Question anything that you've been taught most of your life. It doesn't matter how sure and certain it seems like.
[00:17:06] If we've learned anything as human beings, it is that some of the most amazing beliefs, some of the most certain beliefs have come to not apply anymore. Something as simple as the sun revolved around the earth. Stop being true. Something is so concrete as the law of gravity. We used to think it was a pulling force, but actually, we're learning more and more that there's a battle model that Einstein came up, which makes it a pushing force,
[00:17:41] something like the sun rises. Actually, no such thing happens. It's just from our own perception. If you go outside you'll find that, you know, The sun is not rising or sitting, we're just rotating around it. We're learning all this. So then what else have we taken for granted? [00:18:00] Why don't you think about that?
[00:18:02] Where do you fit in, in this bigger scheme of things? Where is your creative energy in all this? Because if you even remotely believe that you're connected to that same creative power or force that creates the sun, that has shaped the sun, that has shaped all the powerful ecosystems that are on Earth, the solar system, galaxy, universe, cosmos, if you are an aspect of that same creative force, then you have certain natural abilities that you've probably not expressed yet or fully yet.
[00:18:41] And it goes beyond your skill sets. It goes beyond your role. And I want you to consider those things. And my question to you is, how have you developed confidence in in your life? whether it's in relation to your skill sets, your roles, or in who you are. Love to know your perspective on this. Until my next video and training. Hope you guys have an incredible day. Bye.